Why am I so inactive?

Hey guys. Welcome back. I'm sorry I haven't been able to post much on this blog either. I'm trying my best to be active. I'm dealing with a lot of depression and anxiety lately. Much comes from the stress factor of homework and quizzes. I expected this beforehand though. Sometimes people say," Act like your age." But. I don't know what that means. Am I suppose to be a typical teenager who acts extremely mature and very well handled? Who goes in and out of relation ships like it's nothing? Well. I'm sorry, I'm not that type of person. I'm struggling a lot. And trust me, it hurts. I'm trying and pushing my efforts to the max. But it's not enough. They tell me, it's not enough. It's okay, you're born dumb. It's useless. I'm trying everything I can but all they do is look down at me. Picking the students that have the most experience and is extremely smart. It's great that they are smart, and it's great that they know much,much more than me. But, I can also do it too. I can also be on their level too. But you are just looking down on me, thinking that won't affect me. But it does. It affects me to the point, my learning abilities can't surpass theirs because of your judging.